Trailing Off....: And the world's your oyster.....

Bangkok skyline from skytrain

Though I live in a developing country, I lack nothing for basic survival. I have concrete walls and a roof and not some shack made of dung and straw. I have indoor plumbing that doesn’t require squatting. Professionally distilled drinking water is delivered when I need it, thus preventing any two hour treks with a large pot balanced on my head. A daily market offers an array of fruits, vegetables, and meat and if I were to want “overly processed foods”, I’m always five minutes walking distance from an air-conditioned 7-Eleven complete with coke slushies, cheetoes, rotating hot dogs, instant noodles, and even imported chocolate bars. If I fall through a sewer grate (which I have done) or contract some jungle virus, there’s a hospital that will take me and my insurance card for a pittance. And I can get there by tuk-tuk or motorcycle taxi rather than a horse or mule.

A place with tall buildings--wow!!!!

However, sometimes a middle-class American girl wants the basic comforts such as a sofa, a soft bed that isn’t on the floor, hot water, A/C on 100+ degree days (which is everyday), English TV, a cinema, and Mexican food. So having a few days off between semesters, we decided to have a gluttonous holiday (glucation? Vaglution?) in the metropolis of Bangkok. Forget the Grand Palace where the King lives or the abundance of old and famous Buddha statues in various poses. Screw the museums and art galleries. Bugger off culture and history! We were on a mission for food, film, and general frivolity.

Only looked at monuments like this one from the sky train

To squeeze out every possible satong for the mission, we took the 14 hour overnight bus from Songkhla to Bangkok, which included two blaring American blockbusters dubbed in Thai and a free middle of the night meal. At the bus station we bought our return ticket, and took the pubic bus ($.75) to our hotel.

We debated how upscale to go with the accommodation, but decided that we wanted such basic comforts that a low-mid range was suitable if located on Sukhumvit, near the best cinemas, pubs, restaurants, and sky train. The Unico Express has a pool, massage parlor (happy endings likely optional), restaurant, outrageously overpriced internet to give the place an upscale feel. The “standard room” we stayed in had a big dreamy bed with a heavy comforter, a sofa, A/C, bathtub, hot water, and CNN. So what if there were mysterious holes in the gray indoor/outdoor carpet, cigarette burns on the tub, room service cheeseburgers with no cheese or buns, and a window with a view of a concrete wall? After being in our Spartan apartment for 7 months, it was the Ritz, and only 750 baht a night (about $25).

watching election coverage from comfy bed

Bags were dropped off by 11:00 am, so we had 4 days of shopping, movie watching, and restaurant crawling before boarding the overnight bus back to sparseness.

first meal after the long overnight bus journey: grilled stuff, humus, falafel

Shopping

I thought we might find some Christmas presents on the trip, so we went to the Chatuchak Market, a huge sprawling weekend market very much like the Grand Bazaar in Istanbul. Hundreds of small stalls are grouped by the type of product they sell and you can find almost anything there: locally made trinkets, wedding invitations, belts, pets, lamps, used books, massage oil, art, t-shirts, antiques, and for some reason, posters of old French newspapers. It’s a mad house labyrinth, which we of course got lost in. We did manage to escape with a few treasures.

one stall of dozens selling Buddha stautes

Khao San Road is the famous backpacker street full of pubs, street food, and souvenirs. It’s often the launching point for tourists visiting Thailand. I’d been there many times but this last time it seemed that every shop sold the same t-shirt capitalizing on the Gangnam style craze and the same wooden frogs which I’m quite sure are made in China. Also the Arab guys trying to sell tailored dresses and suits seemed to get in my face every few feet. After having a quick beer, we left the place having only bought an illegally photocopied Lonely Planet guide to India, but no souvenirs or hair braiding.

lots of neon lights confuse my camera

The Paragon Department Store is the schwankiest place I’ve ever been in. On the ground floor is an entire maze of gourmet restaurants, the second floor has a Lamborghini dealership, and the third, a bibliophile’s haven. So many new, beautiful, smell good books of all genres in English!! I could have browsed all day. There were a ton of other clothing, perfume, and typical mall shops but browsing for (real) Prada merchandise just isn’t my thing.

Movies!!!!

On the top floor of the Paragon is a glamorous 14 screen cinema with a Haagen Das shop, wine bar, McDonald’s, and spotless restrooms with luxurious soap and soft paper towels. And of course, pop corn and soda. Though many other cinemas can be found through the city, we saw a movie 3 of the 4 days here.

chandelier=class

Looper—Fantastically fun! Well-constructed story that doesn’t leave you confused, great characters, a successful mix of genres, and Bruce Willis at his best.

Argo—Amazing true story directed by Ben Affleck, who is much better behind the camera than in front of it. Knowing that it really happened allows you to forgive some of the artistic Hollywood license Affleck uses in the climatic scenes.

Paranormal Activity 4—Only chose this one because the projector for the Ethan Hawke film was mysteriously broken (as it turns out if we had seen the other movie which was later, we would have missed the bus back to Songkhla). Kermode reviewed the plot of this movie best: “Boring. Boring. Boring. LOUD NOISE!!! Boring. Boring. Boring. Boring. LOUD NOISE!!”

Food/Pub Crawls

On our first night, we had planned to take the train and then a canal taxi to Khao San Road but as we were walking to the skytrain station, we ran into our friend in Songkhla who was in Bangkok on business. He’s lived in Thailand for over 10 years and some of those years were in Bangkok. Needless to say, he knew some good spots. We spent a great deal of time at a pub with an excellent happy hour special and open air sitting, perfect for watching the ladyboys, girls on the prowl, thugs amped up on ya ba (Thai meth), and old crusty white guys arm in arm with fresh faced girls half a century younger than themselves. After happy hour expired, we visited some “girly” bars where scantily clad ladies danced lackadaisically behind steel poles. On our way back to the hotel, which is located near Little Arabia, we got a cheap and tasty lamb kebab that brought back fond memories of Istanbul.

Stephen fails to entertain the entertainment

One goal I had was to go to a part of Bangkok I hadn’t seen before. Little India seemed like a perfect adventure because it promised some delicious food at the end. Unfortunately to get to Little India, you must go through Chinatown which is as crowded, noisy, and dirty as the real China. But if you’re ever in need of shoes or used car parts, there’s literally a ton of options. At the end of a tiny street in Little India we found Punjab Sweets, which is a sweet shop and grocery story with a restaurant attached. When we walked upstairs and saw over a dozen Indian men drinking tea and having a chat, I knew we’d found a good place. The menu was one page and a third of the price of the Indian restaurants near our hotel. The misery of the one hour journey melted away as we tucked into a cheese filled dosa the size of a long tail boat and devoured a bowl of curry with potatoes and veggies and a bowl with big cubes of paneer in a thick, creamy, spicy sauce. After we paid, we noticed a samosa vendor and had to try one. Maybe the best samosa I’ve ever had.

dosas + curry: so simple, so delicious

One night we wanted to do a pub/food crawl. Soi 11 seemed to have an array of places and wasn’t too far from the hotel. Our fare included Spanish tapas, Mexican burritos, quesadillas, and margaritas, German appetizers (a lot of potato), and a requisite stop at the Irish pub. The problem with a food/beer crawl is that you get sleepy rather quickly, so we went back to the hotel and watched a bit of CNN before falling into a food coma.

definitely NOT like the Dublin Mulligans....

Other treats we enjoyed included spinach filled cannoli and a sandwich made of pizza crust at an Italian place, a meal of hummus, falafel, and grilled lamb at an Egyptian restaurant, a bacon cheeseburger, vegetable wantons from a street vendor in Chinatown, and a Burger King cheeseburger which in my opinion, is superior to a McDonald’s cheeseburger. The one food we didn’t have was Thai food.

also did not try the assortment of fried insects

Traveling in Bangkok during rush hour in the rain is a rather idiotic thing to do, but we had no choice as the bus left at 18:40. It was a tense 1.5 hour stop and start ride in the taxi but we made it with several minutes to spare. The bus ride back was easy and uneventful. If you sleep, it’s like getting travel and accommodation in one pop. In the early morning, we went home to comfort our cat who seemed to be traumatized by our absence, take a cold shower, and head to the office to sign our name and get on with the preparation for the next semester. We ate in the canteen, went home to sleep in the hard bed on the floor, and slipped right back into the rhythm of a basic existence in a small town in a developing country.